If there is no Battle there should be no "Battle Captain"
Published on March 7, 2007 By greywar In Politics

Fact 1: There are very few Warriors who actively fight the enemy in armed combat in the Army. I would put this percentage at 15% or less of the active duty force and I frankly think that is an overestimation.

Fact 2: The Army is full of pogue retards who desperately want to be thought of as Warriors. they often seek to associate themselves with the Iraq or Afghan Wars by using lots of jargon like "Battlespace", "Warfighter", and give their pogue staff titles like "Battle Captain".

     If no one is shooting at you, you aren't in the War. If you go to work everyday at a stateside base you are not in a Battle. If you are a civilian at a stateside post in Networking you are definitely not a "Battle Captain"!

     Nonetheless this person does in fact exist and is not a rarity. Our network department has 1 General, 1 Colonel, 2 Lieutenant Colonels, a platoon of senior enlisted and another platoon of junior NCO's working alongside a bloated contingent of civlians of which I am one.

     The trend among eunuch officers like ours is to soften their very obvious non-Warrior status by ordaining as many "Battle Captains" as they can get away with and using as much jargon as possible to make it sound as though they are combat commanders instead of support REMF's. Our landed gentry have actually started making civilians into "Battle Captains" as well as a result of the twisted synergy between this movement and political correctness.

     What is a Battle Captain supposed to be? Here is about as good a definition of the position as I have been able to find:


"The battle captain should be capable of assisting the command group in controlling the brigade or battalion. Remember, the commander commands the unit, and the is the chief of staff; BUT, those officers and the S3 must rest. They will also get pulled away from current operations to plan future operations, or receive orders from higher headquarters. The battle captain's role then is to serve as a constant in the CP, someone who keeps his head in the current battle, and continuously assists commanders in the command and control of the fight. " From Global Security"


     Note how this has everything to do with actual combat arms forces and nothing at all to do with pogues like us who do little else besides checking our "combat email". We are not Warriors and neither are our military counterparts here.

     The whole damn thing should just be converted to civilian ops with a single military liaison at the top of the organization if hey feel the need. Instead, the support section of the Army continues to develop delusions of grandeur and pollute the last remnants of the dying warrior culture of the combat arms.

    Moron officers appointing stateside civilians as Battle Captains should be publicly dick-whipped and then cashiered out of the service. As a side note I bet there are plenty of "Battle Captains" securing desks at Walter Reed as well. Call it a hunch.

 

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Comments
on Mar 07, 2007
Once again, Grey, I sense your hesititation to speak your mind. If you hold all that inside you like that, it's just gonna eat away at you!   
on Mar 08, 2007
on Mar 08, 2007
Like every exercise pre war, now they think what they do is important in the big picture so they give it an important sounding title and, Presto! Instant Warrior!
on Mar 09, 2007
It's very psychological. Like when I try to get my little guy to help clean his room, I call him my "good little helper" and it motivates him to pitch in and help out.

And instead of the "GREAT JOB" stickers I give him, the military gives its personnel pretty little ribbons to wear on their uniforms. (National Defense Ribbon?)

If it works, great. Last I checked, we are at war and every member of the military needs to be as motivated as possible.

It's all semantics, grey. Just let it roll off of you like water off a ducks back.
on Mar 10, 2007
But, but but, "I am a warrior and a member of a team"....." I stand ready to deploy, engage and destroy the enemies of the United States of America in close combat"................by keeping the urinals shiny.

I am "Army Strong", and as an "Army of One" I am a Battle Captain of the latrines. Hoo-ah.

I still remember the "you are all leaders" thing at Ft. Hood. Then when logic finally kicked in, it was evaded by, "You are all leaders......or leader builders."
on Mar 10, 2007
"I am a warrior and a member of a team"....." I stand ready to deploy, engage and destroy the enemies of the United States of America in close combat"


I need to memorize this in 2.5 weeks.
on Mar 14, 2007
Can I have a cooler title than Military Language Instructor? I feel so left out with a title that is spot on with what I do...
on Mar 16, 2007
>>Moron officers appointing stateside civilians as Battle Captains should be publicly dick-whipped and then cashiered out of the service.
Don't tell me you were promoted, Greywar. This can't actually happen.