Drinking to excess

Some call me.... Satan?

Published on April 25, 2004 By greywar In Personal Relationships

Some call me…

Some call me…. Satan?

Last night I had occasion to wonder if I have developed some sort of persuasive power over others. Over the course of the last 15 years or so I have spent a lot of time drinking with friends most of them men. During this time a disturbing pattern of behavior emerges, whenever I am around someone who is drinking they seem to be pushed to drink far beyond their normal tolerance levels. I know I have pushed some of them into this behavior through verbal pressure but the primary motivator seems to be that my friends ave an insane desire to “stay even” with me when I drink. This is sheer folly.

I am 6’1” tall and tip the scales at around 245 lbs (186 cm and 111 kg for the Eurofolk), a good bit of my ancestry is Irish, and I have a lot of practice drinking. This combination of factors has given me a near superhuman ability to tolerate levels of blood serum alcohol that would cripple an elephant. Trying to “stay even” with me is a losing proposition at best. This does not prevent people from making the attempt however.

My buddy SGT Negrodamus and I have been drinking together nearly every weekend for a good long time now and he has always had a thing about trying to “stay even”. This came to a head last night when he took off on a massive tequila binge. Now I won’t even touch tequila. When he asked me why I wouldn’t join him in this exercise in self-abuse I told him, “Tequila just makes me vomit.” His response? “I never puke”. He should really learn to stop saying things like that. Much like Caiphus Cain they always come back to bite him in the ass. (I dread the day all his Semitic karma catches up to him). Many, many, many shots later he paid the price but for the sake of his already shredded dignity I will not relate the gory details.

Did he stay even? Hell he passed me as I was in no mood to even contemplate such a liver-pounding endeavor. Hopefully I will never feel the need to do anything on that scale again. I would like to think I have outgrown it. Now I just need to figure out how to turn off my “Enabler” super-powers so my friends will live longer too.

To all the buddies who have fallen into this trap with me before, (Dan, Jerry, John, the 4 Mikes, Jeff, Marc, Charlie, Quez, Ziggy et al...), my apologies.

P.S. I still wont be letting any of you choke me as revenge though so just forget about it!

Comments (Page 1)

dharmagrl

on Apr 25, 2004

“Tequila just makes me vomit.”

Me too. I had a rough experience with Te-kill-ya and Sambuca one night. Me and my friend managed to put away all of a fifth of Cuervo, half a fifth of Sambuca and a 12 pk of beer between the 2 of us...and we're only little people (I'm 5'2" and 123, she's 5'1" and 130). Consequently the mere smell of tequila makes me gag and I can't handle the smell of aniseed either.

I think that people just want to drink to excess with you because you're a big, macho dude. They want to see if they can find a chink in your armor..see if they can find your weakness, dig?

greywar

on Apr 25, 2004

Lol, I may be big but I am not terribly macho:) I am closer to the Stay-puft marshmallow man than I am to Grizzly Adams:)

dharmagrl

on Apr 25, 2004

ROFLMAO...Stay-Puft? Like the big fluffy dude in 'GhostBusters'?

You seem pretty dang macho to me...but that's prolly 'cause I'm a girl.

Marvin Cooley

on Apr 25, 2004

When i was 14 my father took me, my buddy and his father camping. me and my friend had our own tent. we had stolen a bottle of cluney. we drank the whole bottle between us that night. i dont know how we made it up the next morning looking and acting normal. Alcohol is very destructive if overdone.

dharma is right. men drink to prove they are macho and can outdo their buddies.

Marvin Cooley

on Apr 25, 2004

dharmagrl

on Apr 25, 2004

dharma is right.

HOLY COW!!!!! Wait, let me get a pen and mark this auspicious occasion on my calendar...."Sunday, April 25th...Marvin said I was right".

Sorry Marv, I had to do it. You know I love you really....don't you?!

pseudosoldier

on Apr 25, 2004

Hey, I've never had a problem. And I was never there when you and Raver would brawl (didn't happen at *my* house, anyway). I think the worst incident of it that I have seen was the time you "put the Mexican down before he hurt himself"... or was it "for the good of society?" I forget.
Really, I'm so much more of a wuss in the alcohol tolerance department, I never *really* tried to keep up. I just tried to impart the perception that I drank much. (I'm still more hoss than Old Man Norm, tho.)

Arquonzo

on Apr 25, 2004

I don't recall ever trying to challenge you in the drinking arena, Greywar... I believe my angle was usually having a few with you, and then being amused when you'd start swaying as you talked.

I discovered my limits in Korea, and they ain't very high. And by the way, thanks again for the Prairie Fire, and the Thunder Something too! Had any more old growlers lately, or have you been sticking to boxed wine?

Estrogen Lass

on Apr 26, 2004

They are called Thunderfucks, I believe. Greywar was kind enough to show me the wonder of this drink.......so good. So so yummy, and before you know it you're seconds from passing out. I have no amusing drinking stories. Everyone that knows me knows that I cant drink worth shit. But I am sure that Greywar could elaborate more on my stories as I ususally cant remember what happens half way through my first drink.

Grace

on Apr 26, 2004

This is off the subject but if any of you bloggers can help me, I would appreciate it. I have tried to establish my own blog and after if fill in all the blanks, password, etc. and I try to submit, I always get the message that it is not possible to view this page. Help!

greywar

on Apr 26, 2004

Grace - Are you trying to create it from inside your blog navigator or in just your normal browser window?

grace

on Apr 26, 2004

greywar - I tried from both the normal browser window and from inside this blog navigator. The results were both the same: This page can not be viewed.

greywar

on Apr 27, 2004

Hmm.. I think you should try setting it up from Allen's computer and see if it does the same thing.....

mignuna

on Apr 29, 2004

tequila makes me vomit, too. or at least it used to (in the days when i was somehow never going to be *gasp* over thirty).

i have officially "retired" from drinking binges. these days, i rarely drink at all. my husband says this is a good thing. of course he does ... he can get as messy as he wants and i have to drive. but i think he also means that i am a dick when i am drunk. this seems to be popular opinion, so i have to concur ...

and greywar, causing other people to do stupid stuff to try and impress you is a great skill !. do not overlook it's value in your life for the entertainment it must provide you ...

mig XX

MasonM

on Apr 29, 2004

Te-kill-ya just makes me want to fight and it's always with some guy bigger than me. I'm a big guy, but there's always somebody bigger lol

That's why I swore off the stuff for good. A cold beer now and then suits me just fine and keeps my knuckles intact.

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